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Boys seem magnetized to men who express the full range of emotions. But he also sees that the message is easier to take coming from a Greek hero. The norm for male behavior may be stuck in a place that isn't doing boys much good. New research on motivation encourages kids to fail. Facebook Twitter Flipboard Email. Nearly 20 years ago The Atlantic ran a cover story about the boy crisis in schools. Accessibility links Skip to main content Keyboard shortcuts for audio player.

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The norm for male behavior may be stuck in a place that isn't doing boys much good.

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Is It OK For Boys To Cry?

To me the most promising efforts are the ones that address male vulnerability on its own terms, or at least in gender-neutral terms. But another body of research shows that teaching boys to accept their own vulnerability is harder than we think. One body of research shows that boys will fall further behind in school and in an increasingly complex society if we do not teach them how to be emotionally open and honest, able to recognize and navigate their feelings rather than stuffing them down. The Betrayal of the American ManSusan Faludi says that these days boys are modeling themselves on what she calls "ornamental masculinity" — the flattened, crude version of macho that dominates TV and music and porn. As it happens, some of the most exciting trends in education right now are ones boys can get behind. Despite our best intentions, our progressive instincts, and an increasingly gender-fluid society — the mama's boy stigma dies hard.

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